Karen Vincent

Galatians 6:7-8 describes the law of sowing and reaping. "Do not be deceived," it says. "God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life."

You reap what you sow. If you sow oranges, you get an orange tree. If you sow apple seeds, you get apple trees. It's a pretty simple concept

But there's another part of the law of sowing and reaping, and it is this: You do not just reap what you sow, but you also reap where you sow. If you plant an orange tree in a field across town, it's not going to grow in your backyard.

That applies to marriage, too. You cannot sow good fruit at work and reap it at home. You do not sow in your children and reap the benefits in your marriage. You do not sow with your friends and reap with your marriage.

You reap where you sow.

You cannot take something that belongs to your spouse-or something that belongs to God-and sow it somewhere else. That's dangerous, because wherever you sow, you get a harvest.

If I am not investing in God or my spouse but instead am pouring myself into my work, then I begin to have experiences that bond me to my work. Work becomes my passion.

If I am investing myself primarily in my friends, then I will reap a harvest from them. My passions and excitement will be directed that way. If I am only investing in my children, then they will be the source of my harvest.

This is what happens between us and God, and this is what happens in marriages. Our priorities and our passions get directed toward the wrong things. These things begin to feed our passions, and before we know it, they consume us. We have our priorities all wrong because we are sowing into the wrong places.

You might be pouring everything into work, until your wife says, "You are at work too much. I feel neglected. I want you to come home."

You might be pouring yourself too much into your kids, until your husband says, "I love the kids, but you are always so exhausted at the end of the day. I want you to give to me what belongs to me."

Or you are giving yourself to all these other things and God is saying, "I want you first. I want you to come back to me."

And we are conflicted, because our passion is no longer directed toward our wife or our husband or even to God. We have no emotion left for these things. And people who are controlled by their emotions never do the right thing.

The right thing is commitment. Like the church in Ephesus, we need to return to our "first love" (Rev. 2:4). First love means "passionate love." Where is your passion directed?

When we are passionate about our first love-God and our spouse-then we are willing to give up anything for them. God is worth it. Your spouse is worth it.

Are you sowing into the wrong places? Invest first in your relationship with God, then sow into your marriage. Because you won't just reap what you sow, you also reap where you sow.