Our first year of homeschooling, I had a seven-year-old, a five-year-old, and a three-year-old, plus a constant struggle with depression partly rooted in a lack of spiritual growth. At this time, I found another Christian mom, with children my children's ages, in whom I saw wonderful spiritual maturity. This other mom agreed to spiritually mentor me. For a year, we met together, did a Bible study, memorized Scripture, and discussed the practical aspects of our spiritual walk as Christian women. I was so grateful for the investment this woman made in my life. That year my friend's children were in a Christian school, but the following year she decided to homeschool them.
Although our mentoring time lasted only one year, we continued to maintain a friendship. After a year of homeschooling, my friend chose to put her boys back in a Christian school. I can still remember her words to me that afternoon as I sat in her home, and she justified her actions, "Oh, Teri. I just want to be a mommy. I want to welcome my boys home in the afternoon as their mommy. I don't want to have to be their teacher too. I just want to be their mommy." I recall driving home that afternoon in tears. "Lord, I just want to be a mommy too. I want all the happy, fun things about being a mommy with none of the difficulties."
In my mind, I pictured my friend's children coming home from school in the afternoon. She would have spent the day in personal Bible study, prayer, exercise, housecleaning, reading, ministry, sewing, and cookie baking. As the children bounced in the door, they would be met by a beautiful, smiling mommy. I was sure she would have taken a long shower and blown her hair dry too. The children would smell the freshly baked cookies and scramble for a seat at the table. There they would happily discuss the excitement of their day in school. Finally, they would head outside to play while my friend started supper in peace and quiet. I just want to be a mommy too!
As I prayed about my heart-wrenching discussion with my friend and my personal feelings about wanting to "just be a mommy" too, the Lord soon began to show me some things. He made me realize that my homeschooling lifestyle was "just being a mommy" in its fullest sense. As we begin a new school year, perhaps you are struggling with feelings of not wanting to tackle another homeschool year. Maybe you have even thought the thoughts of my friend when she told me she "just wanted to be a mommy." It could be that this is your first year of homeschooling, and you are concerned about being both a teacher and a mommy. Perhaps your role as a homeschool mom has lost the joy it once had. Together let's encourage one another in the direction the Lord has led each of us in homeschooling. After all, I just want to be a mommy!
What does being a mommy really mean? Titus 2:4 tells the old women to "teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children." Easily seen then, my role as a mommy is to love my children. Practically speaking, how is this done? Do I have more chance to love my children when they are away from home at school for seven or eight hours or when I have them home with me all day? The answer to this one is obvious: when they are home with me. By loving my children, I just want to be a mommy!
During those extra hours I have to "just be a mommy," I can tell my children over and over again how special they are to me, how much I love them, how wonderful they are, and how blessed I am to "just be their mommy." I have seven more hours a day to give them hugs, pat them, put my arm around them, smile at them, kiss them, laugh with them - opportunities to "just be a mommy." The bottom line is, "I just want to be a mommy!"
What about the time we spend in homeschooling? Have I taken off my "mommy" hat and replaced it with a "teacher" one? I am taking the place of a teacher in a classroom in my children's lives, but I am still "Mommy" in the fullest sense of the word. My mommy role as a teacher began from the first words I quietly whispered in each newborn baby's tiny ear. Almost everything my children have learned in their young lives, this mommy has had a part in teaching them. Being an official teacher in our homeschool is simply an extension of this natural teaching relationship that exists between a mother and her child. Really and truly, I just want to be a mommy!
I thought about what it meant to be a mommy teacher beyond simply teaching my children facts and figures. What teacher in a school loves their students like I love mine? What teacher's main goal in life is to see their students grow up to love the Lord Jesus Christ with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength? What teacher is going to cuddle a sick student on the couch, tucking that student in with extra pillows and blankets, while loving and consoling him through his misery? Hey, I just want to be a mommy!
Perhaps I should consider the time spent in disciplining or correcting my children during school hours. Maybe I am not being a "mommy" then. Once again Scripture assures me that this is part of my mommy role. "My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother" (Proverbs 6:20). My friend didn't like to have to make her children do their schoolwork. Sometimes they cried about what they were to do for school and this was part of why she abandoned homeschooling in favor of "just being a mommy." One of my most important "mommy" responsibilities is to prepare my children for life. If they face a difficult task in their school and choose to cry about it, this is my chance, as their mommy, to encourage them to pray about it, to put forth some effort, to try again, and to rest in the Lord. What opportunity these hours my children are home with me during school time afford. Wow, I just want to be a mommy!
Every day I have a choice set before me. I can look at my homeschooling with resentment and think, "Lord, I just want to be a mommy," while sending my children away to school and doing what I want to do all day. I might think these same thoughts without acting on them but all the while wishing I could put them in school. It will still affect my attitude toward my children and my homeschooling. Alternatively, I can view homeschooling with rejoicing in my heart and say, "Lord, I am so grateful to just be a mommy. Thank you that homeschooling is part of the mothering I can give to my children. I know there are moms who want to homeschool their children but can't. I know there will be difficult days for us as we homeschool our children. Yet, it remains with me as to what I will allow in my thoughts." May we be mothers who relish our roles as homeschooling mommies. Let's never forget, I just want to be a mommy!
The Origins of Mother's Day
Mother's Day, Muttertag, La Festa della Mamma, Mothering Sunday, Fête des Mères, Día de las Madres... it goes by many different names, but however you say it, the expression of love and appreciation is the same.
Motherhood has always been celebrated. In prehistoric tribes the mother Goddess was worshiped as the creator of life. Female goddess figures are found in many archeological digs.
In ancient Egypt, Isis was the Queen of Heaven who ruled over all matters concerning mothering. In ancient Greece Rhea was revered as the mother goddess and in ancient Rome it was Hera, the jealous wife of Zeus, and another mother goddess known as Cybele.
Most mothering festivals in early history were in the springtime to celebrate the rebirth of the land and the beginning of the most fertile time of the year. These festivities honored the goddess in all women.
The modern version of Mother's Day with families bringing Mother's Day flowers and gifts to their moms can be traced back to seventeenth century England. Mothering Sunday was the fourth Sunday in Lent...a special day when all the strict rules about fasting and penance were put aside. Older children who were away from home learning a trade or working as servants were allowed to return home for Mothering Sunday. The family gathered for a mid-Lenten feast with Mother as the special guest. Along with a rare visit from her children, mothers were given treats of cakes and wildflower bouquets. While 'Mothering Sunday' is still celebrated, most now know it as Mother's Day.
The history of Mother's Day in the rest of the world is a bit different. In the USA, the early English settlers often disapproved of the more secular holidays and the Mothering Sunday tradition never really took hold. Early attempts to have a day to honor mother's were mixed with woman's suffrage and peace movements and were not very popular.
Julia Ward Howe who wrote the words to the Battle Hymn of the Republic, suggested the idea of an International Mother's day to celebrate peace and motherhood in 1872. There were many other women who were active with local groups holding annual Mother's Day remembrances, but most were more religious gatherings and not the holiday that we have today.
One of the women, who was working on establishing Mother's Day as a national celebration was the mother of Anna Jarvis. Mrs. Jarvis held an annual gathering, Mother's Friendship Day, to heal the pain of the Civil War. After she died in 1905, Anna campaigned for the establishment of an official Mother's Day to commemorate her mother.
"Miss Anna Jarvis was as good as her word. She devoted her entire life to the struggle to have Mother's Day declared a national holiday. In the spring of 1908, Anna wrote to the Superintendent of Andrew's Methodist Church in Grafton, West Virginia, where her mother had taught Sunday School classes for over 20 years. She requested that a Mother's Day service be held in honor of her mother.
Thus, the first official Mother's Day celebration was held at Andrew's Methodist Church on May 10, 1908, with 407 persons in attendance. Anna Jarvis sent 500 white carnations to the church in Grafton. One was to be worn by each son and daughter and two by each mother in attendance.
Another service was held in Philadelphia later that afternoon where Anna resided with her brother. Anna had requested that the first official service be held in Grafton, where the Jarvis family had lived so much of their lives and where her mother had served for so long as a teacher and public servant." ( Mother's Day Shrine.org)
Anna Jarvis' campaign is the reason we have a formal holiday. In 1914 President Woodrow Wilson declared that Mother's Day should be celebrated as a national holiday on the second Sunday in May.
It didn't take very long for Mother's Day to change from a semi-religious occasion of prayers for peace and appreciation of the work and love of mothers around the world to a gifts, flowers, candy and dining out extravaganza. Anna Jarvis was actually arrested at a Mother's Day festival while trying to stop women from selling flowers. Jarvis said "I wanted it to be a day of sentiment not profit."
Mother's Day may not have turned out to be the holiday that Julia Ward Howe, Anna Jarvis and countless other women around the world imagined, but it is a celebration of mothers...dedicated to honoring the women who give so much to their families without asking for anything in return. Perhaps every day should be Mother's Day, but most families are too busy with everyday business to say thank you for every meal or every good night kiss.
Once every year, the world stops being busy and says thank you. Flowers, cards and gifts are just the outward signs. What mothers love most is the fact that their families really do notice all that they do and for one day every mom is queen for a day...
